March 15th marked 14 years since my first day of massage school out in Port Townsend, WA.

I spent a little time reflecting on what I’ve learned from having my hands on countless bodies of all different shapes, sizes, and levels of health over the years.  In random order here are some of my observations and things I wish my clients knew.

#2 Wherever you are in your self-care journey is OK

Yesterday I encouraged you to consider not drinking that quad espresso before arriving for your relaxing massage appointment.

I also need to state that, if you do – it’s OK.

Just show up. Be as present as you can. Do your best to just BE in your body. Let go of an attachment to the outcome of your session time and simply pay attention to what your body may be telling you.

The massage room is a no-judgment zone.

Sometimes you’re going to come in and zone right out. Other times you’re going to chat nonstop because it’s the only way to let yourself unwind. You may get one massage a year because you still feel guilty taking “me-time” or because that’s what your budget allows. Sometimes you’ll come in once a week and think a 90 minute massage isn’t enough time because you know that the more your needs are met, the more of you there is to offer to your loved ones. It’s all good.

One of my favorite regular clients was an older woman who started taking care of herself much later in life. She said she didn’t start understanding the value of self-care until she was an ‘old lady.’

At our first meeting she told me (para phrasing), “Look – this is my body. Take it or leave it. It’s been well used. It’s birthed children. It has scars and wobbly bits. There is a tattoo where most people will never see it and hair growing in places I wish it wouldn’t. I’ve spent my whole life taking care of others, putting myself last or not on the list at all. I’ve never felt worthy of this kind of indulgence. Now I know. Life goes by fast. People I spent my whole life nurturing have died. I worked 40 years at a job and never felt appreciated. Now my body is breaking down and there is no one here to piece me back together.  I deserve to be loved, nurtured, valued and respected. I’m making up for lost time here doll, so make it good!”

It took her most of her life to learn how to receive, but once she figured out how valuable she was nothing was going to stand in her way. I know you deserve to carve out time to take care of you. My client knows it too. And wherever you are on that journey – whatever kind of time and space you carve out, or don’t –  however you show up – is perfectly OK.